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Monday, 29 August 2016

There is never a dull moment in the Twitter Universe, especially the Nigerian Planet of that Universe.

Today, Twitter users are sharing #1000NigerianWaysToDie.
This will surely make your evening, especially if you grew up in a typical Nigerian home.

Zaddy @kingfromthewest
When your mom tries to beat you and you dodge it
leboo_ogee @Leb00_ogee
Mum: why are you not eating with your siblings?
Me: I don't like beans...
🔫🔪🔪 
Dewunmi @b_dewunmi
 after your mum cooks efo riro and amala then you say you want rice and chicken stew
Cocoa✨ @BROWNIE__XX
 
Mum: who are you talking to on that phone by this time of the night?
Me:
Papacy @Combs_x
 wen ur gettin a strong beating from some1 and ur fwndz keep shouting Bruce lee Bruce lee
Cocoa✨ @BROWNIE__XX

Dad: ask me a question my child
Me: your mates that are rich do they have two heads?
OTM Escobar @Tobito_SAMA

*Around 2 am*
Mum: why did you lock your room door??
Me: My girlfriend is around pic.twitter.com/gCu5sO6qna
Mr Houzil @_Houzil

Dad; you are always pressing ur fone
Me; gbeborun, is it ur fone?
Dad; oya close the door
Lei @Leeiaah_
Look at the floor/ceiling/wall when your mother is taking to you
View image on TwitterView image on Twitter
YOUR FAV HOME BOY @udisiemi_
Mom:Pass me the remote me:mummy catch
YOUR FAV HOME BOY @udisiemi_
Telling your mum you won't go to school because you have headache 
Jon Snow @iam_Dami
Impregnate a military man's teenage daughter. Please just go and buy your coffin jejeli. 
Mustty westbrook @iammustafly
 if the ball should enter ur toros when u are playing kolo.😝
Abu Bakr @its_Abubakr
Daughter : mum I'm pregnant 
Mum: for who

Daughter: for the Barber opposite our shop 

Man.P @odosa_progress

When you hear your Dad fart and you laugh like this
Schön @_kushim
Mom:is this how you will be acting in your husband's house?

Me:Did i tell you i want to get married?
Mufasa ❌ @JeSuisNaga
You go out with your parents to their friends house and you ask for food. 
Mufasa ❌ @JeSuisNaga

Dad: pass me the remote
Me: is your hand paining you?
Mufasa ❌ @JeSuisNaga
You're the last born but you change the channel from NTA to Cartoon Network. 
CHO @Chidubem__O
 
*2 mins into lunch*
Mum: where is your meat? ?
Me: Ehm.. Ma...

Mum:
View image on TwitterView image on Twitter
CHO @Chidubem__O

During midnight call when your mum seizes your phone & you have not cleard whatsapp messages
1000NigerianWaysToDie21000NigerianWaysToDies

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